A Very Hard Post To Share - Please Pray

This is a very hard post to share because I care very much about this family.  It is also hard to share because our family knows first hand the pain, sorrow and uncertainties that come with a diagnosis of cancer.

Diana and "Her Hero" have been family friends for the past several years and they are truly in need of prayers right now.  Diana is a wonderful wife, mother, friend and "blogging friend" to many people.  She has a witty way of sharing experiences of life, yet she also cares deeply for others and often rallies prayer warriors on others behalf through her blog.  She has been there for our family and we have received the blessings from the prayers that she has rallied for us.  

I am sharing the link to her blog post below and ask you to pray for her dear husband who was recently diagnosed with a fast growing cancer.   

A Very Hard Post To Write - Please Pray For Us - My Hero Has Cancer

He is a strong man of faith ready to take on this battle!  Now it's time to rally the prayers for his healing and recovery.  So if you can, please pray for a Christmas time miracle! 

The Work of Grief

I was given a book by my mother about grieving just after Ken had passed away.   I am a firm believer in being a student and actively learning each day.  This book became a great resource for developing a better understanding of what our family has been going through.   So far I have learned that there is no set way to grieve,  that it will be different for everyone and that there is "work" involved in grieving.

I thought I'd share that we have each been grieving in our own way and as the days pass by, many things DO get better.   I believe each of us will gain strength from the things we have experienced and learned during this time.   I also believe that strength gained will be used to serve others in our own special way.

 

I have yet to do all of the "work" of grieving but I have gotten past many difficult things.  Some of this "work" is emotional - as emotions emerge at unexpected times.   Some is physical - especially as I begin to sort things and downsize.   Some is logistical - or what I now refer to as the paperWORK of grief.  So if I haven't written yet, called or came by to visit - it is because I'm still working on bringing closure to many things and taking time to envision new dreams. 

Today marks six months since Ken passed away so I thought I'd update my Blogger online profile. Here's how it now reads:

I am a Christian, was a wife but still a mom. Although I loved my career as a Recreational Therapist, I have been blessed to be a stay-at-home mom for the past nineteen years. It's been a privilege to home-school our children for most of their education. My late-husband was a pastor who was great at teaching people of all ages. He definitely left a legacy, especially in my life. Because of what he taught me, I seek to make a difference in people's lives by sharing resources, wisdom and encouragement!

What a blessing to have been lead and taught by someone who knew what it meant to leave a legacy!  I look forward to getting back to the "work" of leaving a legacy even though it may always be intertwined with the "work" of grief.

I truly look forward to reconnecting with many of you as I write.   I look forward to crossing paths when we can but as always, I look forward to encouraging each other through our words and prayers!

Blessings ~ Lisa

Signs of Spring

In every place there seems to be different things that are considered the signs of spring.  Growing up I remember hearing people say that spring is near when the first Robin would appear.

For ten years our family lived in Wisconsin. One thing we loved about living in Wisconsin was the winter wonderland of fun so it became a family tradition for the kids to build a snowman.  

 

The past two winters we have lived in Illinois.  I think we must have brought some of the winter wonderland with us because both winters have had more snow than usual.  Once again the kids built a snowman. 

As you can see "Little kids,  little snowman.  Big kids, BIG snowman! "

Getting back to the signs of spring . . .

. . . spring is felt when the snowman begins to melt! 

What are your signs of spring?  Is it here, is it near or will it ever appear?

Planning to Have the Best Year

Today is THE day!  Today is the day many of us reflect, review and resolve to make next year the best year ever, or at the very least, better than last year. I personally had a love-hate relationship with this time of year for many years.

I LOVED this time of year for setting goals and having the opportunity to do things better.  I HATED the feeling of failing that came just weeks later.   So, I simply looked for more occasions throughout the year to "start over".  Then I wouldn't feel like a complete failure for not doing what I aimed to do because I gave myself a second chance with each "start over".   I found that I could START OVER on my birthday, on the first day of the church year and on the first day of the month.  I could even START OVER on the first day of the week. As I continued this love-hate relationship between my actions and my feelings,  I recognized that only the TRUTH would set me free of this crazy thinking cycle.

By remembering daily WHOSE I am, I can review each day and be thankful for my blessings,  be aware of my faults,  be sorry for my sins and rest in the assurance that Christ paid the price so I can start over each day a new day no matter how I felt about what I accomplished that day!  As a redeemed child of God, I am never a failure.

I also learned that the setting of regular goals with completion dates, with motivating rewards, a weekly review plus a daily plan of action was the way to stay on track with the earthly tasks of life.   I continue to learn better ways to achieve the things that I want/need to do.  My failure or success in action is just that and I can choose to take the steps in the right direction each day.

Now I have grown to love the "START OVER" that each day offers but I still love this time of year for major reflection and goal setting.  I hope you come to love and appreciate the opportunity each new day brings and that you plan to make this your best year!

TODAY is the day!

A Time to Celebrate

Much has happened this year to have our family take pause and notice just how precious life is, but I am sure we are not the only ones.  What in your life has lead you to pause a moment and take note?

Even though this was our most difficult year as a family, it was a year that showed us God's loving kindness through so many people.  We are all still processing our loss as we move forward in life without Ken.  Many unexpected things have needed tending to. Many undone projects still need addressed.  I will admit that nothing has gone as planned, if you can actually plan out such a time as this.  Then the holidays came quickly as we passed by Ken's (would be) 45th birthday, Thanksgiving and now Christmas. 

Even though it is a time of readjustment, no matter what has gone on in our lives  - Christmas is always a time to pause and take note of the promises of God.  It is always a time to celebrate! 

  With that said, we hope you had a Merry Christmas!

Life Goes On

Today is a day in which our culture celebrates the myths and fears that surround death.  Some of the cultural traditions are fun and some are down-right scary.  Although we can claim to have had some fun on All Hallows' Eve, our family grew to be fairly indifferent to the celebrations going on around us on this day. In fact, it never crossed my mind to purchase candy this year so we are sitting at home with the porch lights OFF!

On the eve of All Saints Day, when many are celebrating the uncertainty that surrounds death, I thought I would write a little about the certainty that comes to those who have faithfully departed in Christ.  About a month ago we said "see you later" to my life-long friend and husband of twenty-five years.  Because of the long term nature of Ken's health problems our family had many opportunities to face reality and to prepare for closure.  We actually considered that part of his illness to be a blessing through the years.

 

Ken had survived liver cancer in 2006 by receiving a life-saving liver transplant.  Throughout 2014 his transplanted liver had been slowly failing and we knew that it was a matter of time before it had completely failed.  Even though Ken was diagnosed with a rare liver disease in 1989 he lived a life much better than the doctors ever expected.  Because of this diagnosis we learned to live a life that kept the truly important things in the forefront.  We learned to say the things that were really important to each other and to our children.  Ken wrote each child a letter before his passing yet there was nothing written that wasn't said at some time.   He did the same for me and I now have in writing letters that highlighted the years of spoken words.

About a week before Ken died he asked me to have our children, parents and pastors meet with him at the hospital.  He had struggled that day with a lot of pain and wanted this opportunity to speak some final words to his loved ones while his mind was clear. He spoke with us all as a group assuring us of his conviction and faith in Jesus Christ. He spoke individually to each of us assuring us of his personal love.   We then ended the night with bible readings and a service to accommodate the dying. 

As a final act of love and closure for us all,  Ken also planned the entire funeral.   He typed out the worship service,  he chose all of the Bible readings and all of the hymns. I think it was so well done it was ready for printing once the church secretary had added in the day of death along with the name of the Pastor officiating the service.  The funeral service ended with this verse from 2 Timothy 4:7 -

 

"I have fought the good fight.   I have finished the race.   I have kept the faith."  

As he planned the service with a specific message in mind,  this verse alone left us all with a final message.   Although life goes on, we were being encouraged to stay focused on the finish line of this earthly race so that life will go on eternally for us all, like it did for him.

A Time for Everything

Thank you, Lord, for introducing me to Ken.  Because of him I have had the opportunity to live an amazing life! He was my best friend of my youth. We attended the same high school, got married, finished college together and then lived in a variety of wonderful
places in IL, MO, MI, TX and WI.

Ken was lead into the ministry which took us to the other side of the world and back.  He served churches in Almaty, Kazakstan; Townsend, WI; 
Washburn, IL and LaRose, IL. 

We were blessed with 25 years of marriage and three great children.  He imparted wisdom and truth unto them and through them, his legacy will definitely live on! 

This week we said "See you later" to a wonderful husband, father, pastor, and friend.  Words cannot express the impact that his knowledge and wisdom has had on so many people all across the world.  
He will be missed but never forgotten.  

We are comforted knowing that his faith was in his Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.  We are comforted knowing that he fought the good fight, finished the race, and kept the faith.  His body has been healed and he lives eternally in God's presence. 

"For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: 

time to be born, and a time to die. . ."